So not cool...

Gentlemen, let's get something straight, technology is not an aphrodisiac. Don't get me wrong, I love technology and what it does for us...but there is one thing that it doesn't do much of: impress women. Yes, there are a few grrls out there who are as tech savvy as the next guy, but most really aren't impressed with your knowledge of the next generation of android.

Now, I know the world is ruled by the geeks at google and the nerds at twitter, but they can overcome their tech awkwardness with a stack of stock options. You, on the other hand, still have to impress a woman with your guile and charm. So, consider this a public service announcement from the stayathomebachelor©, when it comes to attracting a woman, avoid the following five technology pitfalls:

1. Being Mayor on Foursquare - sorry guys, playing electronic tag while running around at night does not provide real social status. As far as I'm concerned, the only way to become "mayor" of a joint is to sit at the end of the bar and drink everyone else under the table...night after night. Additionally, try explaining to your smoking hot date that the reason you are not taking her to Pulino Bar and Pizzeria is because you don't get the points/badges or whatever it is that you "virtually get" by frequenting other places.

2. Wireless, bluetooth earpieces - except when you are driving, they are downright unacceptable. No matter how much lipstick you put on this pig, you still look like an jackass walking around with one of these devices sticking out of the side of your head. Two female friends who meet for drinks after work are never going to be overheard saying, "back off bitch, I saw the guy with the earpiece first".

3. Any Mp3 that is not an iPod (unpaid mention). Sorry, the one you have might be better, might hold more music, might have some nifty feature that you love showing off - over and over again...but it's not cool. And never will be. Basically women will look at you as someone who buys "tier 2" brands and someone who buys tier 2 brands is sort of, well you fill in the bank.

4. Fantasy Sports Leagues (not really a technology, but definitely powered by it). Keep it to yourself...nothing says, "I don't date much" like explaining to woman at the bar the you got screwed because Jose Reyes has a thyroid problem.

5. Gaming. It is time to face the facts, at your age the only gaming you should be doing is in a casino where women in skimpy outfits serve free drinks. If you insist, hide the console. Nothing says you haven't grown up quite like her tripping over your Gameboy (unpaid mention).

Oh, and blogging, I might keep that to myself too...

stayathomebachlor©